Boundaries
- lionessrising
- May 18, 2024
- 2 min read
Updated: Feb 25
Boundaries are essential in any relationship. I have unrelenting standards and a tend to be a perfectionist and I often would pick up too much responsibility and over extend myself in trying to solve complex cases. This leads to burnout but also makes you vulnerable to boundary transgressions.
I ran my own therapy practice and did my own administration and this was challenging in terms of text messages, emails and responding to client communication after work hours.
An area I struggled with was responding to clients who expressed suicidal ideation. I tended to over deliver in terms of my time and I would also be flexible in accomodating clients in crisis. I took after hours calls and saw people on weekends. It is tough with complex trauma to hold firm boundaries - but it is important. Also knowing the limitations in the mental health systems and extensive waitlists for services can mean we are flexible.
As a former therapist, I used to refer to boundaries in my client sessions as the “frame” and I would use this to speak about healthy and safe interactions.
Boundaries also relate to how we are treated in the therapeutic relationship. This includes taking a hard line when we are threatened, insulted and physically assaulted. If a client violates your safety in any way, you have the right to end the sessions and to report this to your supervisor, to do a statement with your local police and to obtain a VRO - violence restraining order for your protection.
This article has some suggestions for working with clients who may be unregulated or violent. Learning skills to de-escalate critical situations is important.
Here are some safety measures if you are working with men who use violence, to protect yourself and maintain professional boundaries:
Conduct thorough risk assessments to understand the offender’s potential for violence.
Develop safety plans based on risk levels and individual characteristics.
Regularly consult with colleagues or supervisors to discuss cases and receive guidance.
Seek emotional support to manage stress and prevent burnout.
Maintain a safe physical distance during sessions.
Use panic buttons or alarms in the office.
Arrange for a colleague to be nearby during sessions.
Choose a well-lit, secure office space.
Clearly define professional boundaries.
Avoid sharing personal information or communication outside of the scheduled session
Learn de-escalation techniques.
Your safety is non negotiable, so prioritize this.
